When you are growing up, it is hard to imagine that shortly after graduating from high school, you will probably know people who are planning weddings. It sneaks up on you. First, it starts with the girl you sat next to in homeroom for four years, and then in a few years, it is someone you knew very well, someone you grew up with. Seeing these people that you know, and eventually your close friends, plan weddings while you are single can be hard to deal with. You may be a bit jealous; frustrated that you can’t find someone to spend the rest of your life with. You may also be confused. Why does this person want to get married so quickly? They are so young, with so much of their life still left to live?
You could also be disturbed because the fact that they are getting married now makes you feel old, as if you are running out of time. At the same time that you are feeling these things, you are probably also really happy for this person, which may add to your confusion. Whatever your feelings are, you cannot let them effect the way you feel about yourself, and you definitely cannot let them effect the way you treat these people. After all, you most likely care about them. But, how can you deal you’re your conflicting feelings of you being single when your friends are getting married?
Realize that your situation is completely different from anyone else’s. It is most likely that you haven’t met the right person for you yet. Be ok with this. You certainly don’t want to settle for someone who isn’t right for you. Also realize that you may have different dreams and passions than this person. Maybe they have dreamt of, and feel they are ready for, settling down and starting a family. If your dream is a little more career-oriented, don’t panic or feel that you need to change. Everyone’s situation is different and you can’t expect your life to play out the exact same way as theirs.
Be ok with who you are and the place you are in. If you aren’t ready to start settling down, be proud of that. There is nothing wrong with wanting to wait until you are more established in your own life and career before you start trying to add someone else to the picture.
If you are upset because you want to settle down, but can’t find the right person, know that you will find them. Don’t try to rush into something with someone who isn’t right. You will only regret it later and then you really will have wasted time making yourself unhappy when you could have been focused on yourself.
Remember that you care about this person. They are your friend, someone you have grown up with or have known for a while. You want to be supportive of them in this decision. Choosing to get married is a huge and stressful decision. They need all the support they can get from those around them who love and care about them. Don’t be selfish and bitter. Be supportive and loving. After all, you would want that if you were in the same situation.